Drash

A few have asked to re-read Alicia's drash (reflection on her Torah portion), so here it is!

Shabbat Shalom. To my family, my friends, my teachers, and everyone here today: thank you so much for celebrating this incredible day with me. It means the world to me that you are all here as I become a Bat Mitzvah.

For my Torah portion, I studied Parashat Tol’dot, specifically the part of the story where Isaac settles in the land of Gerar. I learned that Isaac was so successful and blessed to the point that the local people, the Philistines, got jealous. They did something frustrating: they filled up the wells that Isaac’s father, Abraham, had dug, forcing Isaac to pack up and leave.

What I find so powerful about this story is that Isaac doesn't give up. Instead of complaining or running away forever, he keeps moving, and he keeps digging. He digs three new wells, and he gives each one a name based on the experience he had there. As I stand here today, officially entering Jewish adulthood, I realized these three wells are a perfect map for how I want to navigate the years ahead.

The first well Isaac digs is called Esek, which means Conflict or argument. As soon as his shepherds found water, the Philistine shepherds immediately argued that the water belonged to them.

I know that as I get older, there will be so many moments of contention in my life. This could be a petty fight with a friend over something small, or getting competitive in sports or school. The lesson of Esek for me is that I need to learn to pick my battles. Isaac didn't stay and fight over that first well; he chose peace over unnecessary conflict and moved on. That is the wisdom I want to carry with me.

The second well was called Sitnah, meaning Accusation or Hostility. This conflict was more serious. It wasn't just an argument; it was active resistance and trying to block Isaac’s path.

Sitnah represents those heavier moments: feeling left out, being misunderstood, or facing negativity from others. Sometimes, even when I’m being completely authentic, people might try to stop me or tear me down out of jealousy or their own issues. Isaac’s response to Sitnah teaches me that these feelings are real, but they don’t define me. If a space is filled with hostility, I need to have the self-respect to move away from it.

Finally, Isaac digs a third well, and this time, there is no dispute. He names it Rehovot, which means Wide Places or Expansion. Isaac says, “For now the Lord has made room for us, and we shall be fruitful in the land.”

Rehovot is what I am digging for in my life. It is the broad, expansive place where I can truly be myself—my authentic self—without judgment. It’s where my unique gifts, my voice, and my creativity can flourish. It is the place where I can feel peaceful, do good things for others, and use all the resources and opportunities God has given me—my inner water—to be fruitful.

Becoming a Bat Mitzvah isn’t about suddenly becoming an adult overnight. It’s about taking responsibility for my actions and, just like Isaac, being resilient. Isaac reminds me that I don’t always have to win every fight. Sometimes, it’s better to step back, find another way, and stay focused on what’s important. True strength isn't about winning every argument, but having the wisdom to leave the places of conflict and the perseverance to keep digging until I find my Rehovot. There will be times when I feel like giving up or fighting back. But Isaac’s story reminds me that I can choose a different path. I can choose to be kind, to keep trying, and to believe that there’s space for everyone to grow and succeed. 

My prayer today is that I always have the wisdom to leave the Esek and the Sitnah behind and the strength to keep seeking my Rehovot so that I can create space in my life for learning, for helping others, and for becoming the best version of myself. I also want to help make space for others—to be someone who includes, who listens, and who brings peace instead of conflict.

Thank you to my family and friends, my teachers at Shul and my community for helping me reach this moment. Thank you Ann for helping me lead the service, and Marilyn, who sadly couldn’t be here today, for helping me prepare. And thank you to everyone for being here, and being such a huge part of my journey. Shabbat Shalom.